#18: Something something Captain America and the Oscars
Just why?
Brave New Faceplant
Marvel’s latest hit (into a brick wall), Captain America: Brave New World is…
…it’s not good.
Just what are we even doing anymore?
This feels like a symbiote of 10,000 different scrips Frankensteined by a panel of corporate executives smoking filtered crack. Quite simply, there was too much on the plate. Sam Wilson’s (Anthony Mackie) arc started on an interesting note with the series Captain Falcon and the Winter Soldier… until it didn't. There was a herd in place of a single elephant on the plate. So many interesting political and character questions that were answered with a burp and a fart.
And oh my god… what a bunch of slop-hack dialogue Mackie is given. Like the studio thinks its viewers as a bunch of drooling toddlers, just pure disrespect, with every moment spoon-fed to you with story that can be basically summed up with “What if we hung out at the White House, but President mad?”
And the CGI… And how ugly and uninspired it is…
This movie cost $200 million.
Not to mention that the ANSWER to the so-called twist of this movie—shocker! There’s a Red Hulk!—was not only given away by the marking, but was central to it. The Red Hulk shows up at the end for maybe 5 minutes.
Just a disaster on every level.
The only good things I can say was that was that the camera was in focus and the cherry blossoms were accurate.
Oscar Chaos
I had high hopes for this year’s upcoming Academy Awards. I still retain some modicum of hope. Conan O’Brien is a slam-dunk choice for hosting. A perfect pick outside the revered hopeful John Mulaney.
But HOOOO BOY controversy after controversy.
Instead of going through the pain of analyzing and dissecting each hiccup in detail, I figured that I’d do a quick review of each Best Picture winner, having seen all of them (save for one). My sanity has its limits.
Anora
Starting off with a bang, I am genuinely happy the academy actually nominated a few good movies this year for its highest honor, starting with revered Palme D’or winner Anora, from Sean Baker, America’s independent saint.
Equal parts hilarious and tragic, Anora’s (Mikey Madison) wealth and alcohol-blazed odyssey through the depths of international oligarchy and manipulation is a solemn reminder of the power of the little man’s voice, and in the end, solidarity.
Could be the Best Picture trojan horse.
The Brutalist
The current front runner for taking the gold in the true American epic. The Brutalist is a tale of concurring themes: that of the tortured artists, and the immigrant experience. On a technical level, some of the best stuff I’ve seen in recent years, and especially jaw-dropping given it’s miniscule budget.
My main criticism is the runtime, clocking at just over 3 hours long. I have no problem with movies being long in order to tell the story properly, but The Brutalist, after a certain point, overstays its welcome. If this took home top prize, I would have no complaints.
A Complete Unknown
Another dose of unneeded music biopic. It’s fine, I guess. I just literally don’t care enough to review.
The one thing I have to mention is that Monica Barbaro is genuinely astounding in her performance as Joan Baez, and I would be quite happy to see her take home the Best Supporting Actress award.
Conclave
I just had a great time with this one. An ensemble political thriller set in the Vatican. How can one resist?
I don’t want to say too much about it, but all you need to know is through dialogue by itself, let alone the rest of the marvelous production, keeps you locked in. Save for some odd side narratives, Conclave keeps you locked in by character actors in their prime, just eating this script.
Also vaping priest.
Dune: Part Two
A genuine blockbuster miracle. An expansion and improvement in every conceivable way compared to the first of Denis Villeneuve’s foray into Frank Herbert’s epic.
How Denis was able to successfully translate the tale of what should have been a chosen one into the spiral of a tragic villain is nothing short of staggering, glory, dread, beauty and all.
Emilia Pérez
No.
Just no.
Actual evil movie melded together with bad stereotypes and wretched characters in a tale devoid of meaning and kindness, without input from the actual communities that are being represented.
Not to mention the star being a violently xenophobic racist. And the director not being far behind.
May any award this wins be a curse upon the film industry.
Watch Johanne Sacreblu instead.
I’m Still Here
Sadly, I’m Still Here is the one nominee I did not see.
Heard good things and am excited to watch, though!
Nickel Boys
My favorite movie of the year and by leagues and bound the best film of this group, Nickel Boys is a benchmark in what cinema can do as an artform and a form of storytelling. A spellbinding timeline of shattered memories and unblossomed histories.
A one of a kind, essential piece of astral proportions that cannot be replicated in any other environment. It’s genuinely a sin that this has gone under the radar.
The Substance
The movie that certainly got the most buzz in my circle of weirdo pretentious film buffs.
I wasn’t disappointed by any means, but I felt left desiring more. Demi Moore is The Substance’s daunting strength, the binding cement that heightens writer-director Coralie Fargeat’s delve into exploitation and anti-feminist rot pit that is Hollywood.
Some great stuff in here, with a brilliantly macabre climax, but I wish more of the buildup had a more transgressive tone. But for what it is, it’s a great watch.
Wicked
I just don’t really care for Wicked. I don’t have any sort of personal attachment to the play or the book at all. I cannot deny that Wicked is an out-of-park phenomenon with true cultural staying power.
I just think the movie’s kind of basic.
Fun performances and set pieces with actually great art and production design (sadly washed out by some unfortunate color grading choices), that served an uninteresting plot whose purpose is only to pave the road to the sequel.