8 Balls & 8 Reelers #1: Cursed Television and Fearing Liberation
'I Saw the TV Glow' and Communication
*Spoiler Free review of I Saw the TV Glow
It is a blessing and a curse to be living in the time of the creepypasta. The internet has democratized many aspects of our lives. The digitization of media and literature has given millions of spastic fingers a chance to tell their truths and share them across the entire globe for better or worse (in some cases… much, much worse).
I for one, am both victim and perpetrator of the shameful cycle of doomscrolling and tapping the block button. A sadist tendency permeates younger generations of defining their entire life to what lies on a screen. Euphoria, one beyond our control, lies inside the timeline of fluctuating between cat videos and manic self-doubt. Being there makes us think we are part of the conversation; that we are the topic at hand.
And don’t get me started of influencers.
Not even artistic merit stands free from caveat beyond the ‘share’ button and the scary forum story; a conundrum that plagues forums and twitter threads alike. It asks whether is it possible to differentiate meme culture from art. Is it even possible to define them?
Director Jane Schoenbrun dares to ask: What if there was no dividing line?
What do I say to that? Hell fucking yeah.
Sitting alone in a theater with no leg space strangely felt to be the only correct way to experience I Saw the TV Glow. An emulation of my youthful times of hiding in the corner of my college bed with a laptop, up to pure tomfoolery. I Saw the TV Glow doesn’t feel scary as much as it feels cursed.
We follow several chapters in the perpetually anxious Owen (Justice Smith) who is introduced to an elusive late-night TV show by his older classmate Maddy (Brigette Lundy-Paine). I found myself strapped into a transitory period between analog and digital, heightened by the late 90s setting. To further heighten this, Schoenbrun is as much interested in atmosphere and vibes as much as story, leveling them off on equal playing field.
Schoenbraun utilizes block TVs and cursed media to juxtapose parasocial relationships and freedom. I think the film tackles the double-edged sword of escapism brilliantly. On one hand, the lost TV show of the film, The Pink Opaque, becomes an obsession to Owen and Maddy, to the point that it shapes their entire personalities. It starts to tow the line between good and evil, as Owen is in a not-so-ideal home (Uh… Hello Fred Durst?!), and the show becomes an escape, a path to freedom.
When the film takes a sudden left turn (don’t worry, no spoilers here!) to the surreal, reality and fiction truly start to blur, though nothing will be as startling as the jumpscare appearance of a rabid Conner O’Malley in his natural habitat.
Communication
The film hit a really personal spot in me that I often neglect and ignore, and that it is my own lack of communication and connection. In the age of social media, the entire world is in our pockets, but also so far away. This might be “Old Man Yells at Cloud” energy, but I have a big enough brain to realize that the internet, as much knowledge it contains, makes us attached to a false reality.
When we become attached to this unreality, true life becomes a terrifying monolith. It becomes surreal, and like Owen in I Saw the TV Glow, real life makes us feel dead inside, putting on masks to conceal our true selves.
But as said, there are always two sides to a coin. We can find our interests and true selves. If reading all of this makes you feel insane, downright batshit, welcome to the internet.
Other Watches and Reads
Movies and TV
As a certified gamer/loser, it became my sworn duty to check out the new Fallout series. And goddammit, Todd, you did it again. I’m only a few episodes in, but I am loving the characters and writing. I wish the set design and camerawork were more interesting, but I still have a few episodes to go! Like Star Wars, they understood that the assignment depended on just having guys with cool helmets.
With Assault on Precinct 13 hitting the Criterion Channel, I finally understood John Carpenter’s obsession with the Western genre. It is so clear he wants to make a Western, but lack of funds tend to change that. But in the end, we got a pretty cool “dudes rock” movie.
YouTube
Speaking of Conner O’Malley, his entire YouTube catalog is a treasure trove of chaos
that will likely make you never pick up a device again. Time is a flat circle, and O’Malley holds no distinction between pitch-black humor and grotesque horror. My god, I love it. It’s the kind of content that either you fall asleep to or makes you run head-first into a brick wall.
Books
I finally sat down to read No Longer Human by Osamu Dazai, and boy, does it ever reach new heights of “things I love but can never recommend to anyone else”. This novel is rough and uncompromising. But if you feel truly alone and without purpose, the novel shows that there are people out there going through the same thing. You are worth it.
I’ve been making an effort to read more genre novels written by women, and through a reddit thread stumbled upon Michelle Sagara’s Essalieyan Series. This independent fantasy series already has a whopping 16 books published, with even more to come. I am on the first saga of the series, The Sacred Hunt duology (penned under her husband’s surname, Michelle West), and there is already a lot to love. Despite being her first published works, her writing skills are magnificent, her worldbuilding complex but easy to swallow, and powerful understated prose. It’s a shame that Sagara doesn’t have the wider following she deserves. There is an untapped potential here that greater recognition would help blossom.